Where the Idea of Holding Women's Circles Came From

Why would a successful woman with a well-paid position in a company, a real sense of influence and decision-making power, leave a high-level life among the intellectual and business elite for a quiet, simple life in the countryside? And where did the idea of holding Women's Circles come from?

Recently I listened to an interview with a woman in her 30s, in the life phase of "I can do everything, I want everything — fast, a lot, and I take no prisoners." She is constantly switched on — working at work, working at home, working on vacation, working around the kids. She silences her family with money, she is controlling and demanding. I imagine the only place where she might be "gentle" is with her employees, because she depends on them at least a little. But at home the frustrated dragon has to come out and cry it all out — at the husband, at the children... I don't know if my life once looked exactly like that, or perhaps in a milder version. My memory fails me a bit. But what my body felt while listening to that interview tells me I must have been very close to that picture. I listened to it in pieces — it was simply too painful to absorb all at once.

Przytulam tę kobietę, i jednocześnie przytulam siebie z “wtedy”. Moniu, jakże dużo Cię kosztował ten sukces, ta walka, to bycie w męskiej grze, w męskich jakościach i wartościach. Musi upłynąć czas, musi wydarzyć się jakieś mityczne załamanie, żeby zobaczyć co jest nie tak. Na moje wielkie szczęście nie odbyło się to poprzez chorobę czy wypadek.  W pewnym momencie zmęczenia, frustracji, braku pociągającej wizji zaczęłam się sobie przyglądać i rozważać zmianę. Ostatecznie jestem tutaj, na wsi, siedzę sobie w oknie sypialni i piszę tego bloga wyglądając na drogę, którą bardzo rzadko przejeżdżają auta. Pod oknem pierwsze wiosenne kwiaty, krokusy i tulipany, nieśmiało wychylają z ziemi. Śpiewają kosy na orzechu włoskim, szczeka Whiskers, piesek sąsiada. Synek w szkole, a ja mogę oddać się mojej pasji. Pracować dla Was Kobiety 🙂

In office jobs like accounting or HR, regardless of your level in the organization, you surrender to the rhythm of the process. The cycle is yearly, or sometimes several years long when you work at the strategic level. But they are still cycles of the same goals, the same tasks. More than twenty years in HR management — and every year the same: the same battles, the same goals, the same reviews, the same salary discussions. Sometimes the corporation would bring cost cuts, so there were layoffs. Sometimes a development project appeared — so there were trainings and new hires. After years, it started to bore me deeply. And frustrate me at the same time. Occasionally a breath of fresh air came with a promotion or a new business leader. I would rise a little for a moment... and then the frustration would return. Maybe at some point I simply burned out. Years of high stress must have done their work.

Despite all that, I had two passions in my work that I truly loved. In the last years they were the reason I stayed. The first was developing young managers — both women and men. The second was working with women: supporting their career paths, helping them build their sense of value, power and agency. My favorite meetings were those focused on women's leadership, women's networking, and women's mentoring programs.

I've been working on my emotional and spiritual side since around the age of thirty. It's a path of understanding. Sometimes it takes a very long time. And sometimes a whole new level of understanding appears just from hearing a single sentence. I believe each of us has her own path. Your path is the best one for you, just as mine is for me. We cannot speed it up and we cannot skip parts of it. If I want to travel from Warsaw to Poznań, sooner or later I must pass Łódź. Unless I want to avoid Łódź so much that I decide to go to Poznań in a very, very roundabout way — for example through Tokyo. It's possible. But does it make sense?

So now, back to the main point. I've been sitting here in this peaceful countryside for a few years now. My son has grown, our little Piece of Paradise is arranged and cared for — flowers, fruit, nuts, a cat. Everything is here. A dream fulfilled. I've rested. I've discovered new qualities within myself. And I'm looking for the next ones. Most importantly, I have matured enough to return to one of my professional passions — supporting women on their path. That's where the idea of holding Women's Circles came from — here in the countryside, but also in Warsaw. I started two years ago, but it didn't really flow. Women came, the circles happened — yet I was extremely tired afterwards, completely drained of energy. I couldn't wait for the meetings, but at the same time I felt stress and fear about how I would feel afterwards.

It was my husband who encouraged me to find someone who teaches how to hold such circles — to understand what might be happening to me and why it was so heavy. And that's how I found a wonderful course with Marta Duczman. Four beautiful months of inner work and preparation. And what I can say now is that only now I truly feel I am beginning to hold the Circles — to hold the space, to allow things to unfold. Now my energy actually grows during the Circle and afterwards. Learning how to surrender to guidance from above, instead of pushing everything from my own head.

Now I not only know what I want to do — I know how and why. And that makes the Circles light, joyful, alive, stimulating and nourishing for all the women who participate — and for me as the facilitator.🙂 In one word: I feel that I am home with what I still want to give to the world. And what I want to give to the world — to you, dear Women — is a space to discover your own power and agency. Now is the time of women.🙂 Let's take this power and start from our small places — our homes, our villages, wherever we are. And slowly, step by step, we will make this world a better place. With love ❤️